


"well fuck that wasn't supposed to happen"

by Multifandom_Otaku



Series: kinnie kingdom oneshots????? more likely than you'd think. [3]
Category: Kinnie Kingdom, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Gen, Homestuck References, Kinnie Kingdom SMP AU, Merlot is ever suffering, PLATONIC ONLY - Freeform, Rated T for beeping Language, Traps, because he helped me, flxtlined has a book of crappy poetry, flxtlined is a dirk strider Kinnie, flxtlined is technically a cowriter, this has been confirmed by flxtlined himself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:14:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27274762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_Otaku/pseuds/Multifandom_Otaku
Summary: tl;dr dirk is annoying and dies.
Relationships: flxtlined & Merlot
Series: kinnie kingdom oneshots????? more likely than you'd think. [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979675
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	"well fuck that wasn't supposed to happen"

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Donkey](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donkey/gifts).



> yes this is a part of two series because i am a salty bitch and i'm adding on merlot's pov as a separate work even though it's only gonna be like, an extra 300 words.

Dirk could be doing more productive things right now. He could be writing, or doing commissions or doing literally anything else, but nope. He was just setting traps with the intent to troll his servermates. He wasn't even streaming, just vibing off cams and setting up traps. 

Suddenly, a tweeting sound from his phone pulled him from the extremely complex and totally not just a tripwire and pistons connected with some redstone and a hopper chest to make things a bit easier when returning their stuff. A Twitter notification. 

cherry merlot  
@Merlot07  
Gonna go live in a few and maybe just mine on the server, just to vibe.  
37 Retweets, 62 likes

Flxtty grinned, half-devilishly half-jokingly. Merlot was always fun to prank purely for her reactions, but also because he was lonely and wanted someone to pester on the SMP.

It wasn't Pesterchum, but it would have to do lol.

He then finished his trap, connecting the tripwire and then just leaving it. Dirk was then gonna forget about it and only remember that he made the trap when an angry Hidden C. Sneker comes absolutely fucking fuming into their DMs and starts screaming about the trap that he set and he won't remember until Hidden repeats what she said millions of times. 

And that's on what? An inability to remember anything. And ADHD. ADHD was definitely a contributing factor.

Dirk got another notif on his phone, this time from Twitch. 

Twitch  
merlot07mclive is now live!

He clicked on the stream, grateful for some background noise as he made traps. 

"Hello everyone and welcome to yet another Livestream because I'm bored and have nothing better to do." Merlot said, and he could see the Minecraft loading screen do its thing. No cams though, but that was just everyone's style. Facecams? Never heard of em. At least, not on the Kinnie Kingdom server. 

Flxtty considered crashing the stream, but there wasn't any point to it. At least, not right now. Might be a time later. But not right now. There was like, 50 people watching the stream right at that second.

Dirk just shrugged and got back to work. 

Or maybe not cause his mind was blank. Where the fuck did the brain cell go. No actually where the fuck did the brain cell go.

Ok so maybe he wasn't gonna work. 

_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: what_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: knock knock_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: no_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: cmon please_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: fine_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: who's there_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: the knowledge that wilbur soot had a kid with a mf salmon_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: why must you feel the need to bring that up again_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: you know it haunts my everyday life_

"Welp, five minutes into the stream and i am ready to end it." Merlot's voice made him jump because he forgot that he was watching her stream. You can't be jumpy and watch her streams because there are long silences and then she just randomly starts rambling. no in-between.

Soon, dirk was just working on his shop and doing needed maintenance. Restocking, refilling the Totally Trustable Treasure Trove Tower with Clue Boxes. Okay so maybe they're a bit overpriced, and it might just be a scam, but no one needs to know that. also, nobody needs to know that the hardest to find treasure box is actually filled with different kinds of dirt/grass and spruce wood bc spruce wood supremacy, but also dark oak logs cause it's just cool ok.

Merlot had been rambling about something. Dirk wasn't paying attention so he wouldn't know, but he decided to bother her once again.

_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: please stop talking to me_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: ugh fine what do you want_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: what do u think of catboy maids_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: what_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: answer me please_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: why would you ask me that_

"I am this close to throwing hands with a child." Merlot said, then chuckled. "Damn I really am a techno factkin aren't I?" She seemingly took a glance at the chat and chortled. 

"Yes you are, because I diagnosed you with techno kinnie." Dirk muttered and laughed. That was,,,,,,,, a very long time ago. He was gonna have to look it up. He had no idea how long ago it was because time is wack.

Or ask Merlot. But she wouldn't know either. But he was gonna look it up later.

Dirk honestly didn't know what to do next. Visit Merlot? Or maybe just work on the base? He didn't know. Planning is hard and it was also something he didn't usually do in his daily life.

Okay so maybe it was, but it wasn't that often. And it definitely wasn't for anything like what to do when you're on an mc server and just chillin. Probably work on the base. Or y'know, just pester Merlot a bit more.

_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hehy_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hey_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: what now_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: hye what do you think abt uhhhhhh_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: think carefully about what you're going to say next_  
_You whispered to Merlot07: what do you think abt onceler kinnies_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you:._  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: i will eat your windows_  
_Merlot07 whispered to you: this is a threat_

"I am so close to beating this infant up you people don't even know." Merlot muttered into the mic after a long-suffering sigh. Dirk giggled and decided to send her a dono. 

**flxtlinedmclive has sent a donation!**  
hey merlot, you having fun over there on your end?

"No in fact I'm not." Merlot said, voice sour. "You know what, it's payback time. Time to go and grab Dirk's crappy poetry book and start reading from it."

"WAIT WHAT _NO-_ " Dirk shouted and immediately began to shift into high gear, sprint running to his house. He forgot one certain thing though, of course, he forgot a lot of things, but this was important. That he had set random traps. And so he heard the familiar click of a tripwire hook and his eyes widened in fear as it was too late. The burn of the magma blocks slowly took away hearts until the red screen showed up, telling him that he had died.

And he clicked the second option on the menu, sighing tiredly. 

"well fuck that wasn't supposed to happen."


End file.
